The Ballad of Ashley and Tammy

file_196985_0_sunny300The Twitter war between Ashley Massaro and Tammy Sytch is one for the ages. The former was outed as a high-priced escort by Rolling Stone. The latter diddles herself on Skype for your viewing pleasure.

Am I really supposed to pick a winner?

Now that I’ve justified the misleading headline, it’s time to look at the current state of women in wrestling. It’s in a strange place.

WWE’s Divas are at low ebb. The “Total Divas,” er, reality program dictates what happens on WWE TV. Not necessarily directly, but: “This diva can’t do that because of ‘Total Divas.’ ” There’s a level of protection. “Total Divas” gets priority.

At least, that’s what I’m told. I wouldn’t watch “Total Divas” at gunpoint.

I don’t watch the Divas at all, actually. Their matches are brief and bad. Their storylines are stupid. And they aren’t that good-looking, not by standards previously set. They have disproportionate heads, and other body parts.

Only A.J. Lee, Lana and Summer Rae truly pass the eye test. Like it or not, that’s what the Divas are there for. Paige is pale. Wow, great character. Wait, I thought Sheamus was pale. Is A.J. still crazy? Wait, isn’t Dean Ambrose crazy, too? Is that the best the 50-person writing staff can come up with?

Here’s my game plan for the WWE Divas: Establish Charlotte as a strong heel. Give her the Divas title. Establish Natalya as a strong babyface. Have her chase the Divas title. Let them work real matches, with legit length. Angles, promos, etc.

That would get over. Sasha Banks can work, too. Put her in the mix.

Work doesn’t matter to WWE. Perhaps it should. Because this way isn’t working. The Divas are meaningless. SO TRY SOMETHING DIFFERENT.

Or, just don’t use the Divas at all. The way they’re currently being used, the Divas hurt more than help. CHANGE THE CHANNEL.

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