FORCE OF HABIT: A FAN’S GUIDE TO WASTING MONEY
I hate gimmick matches. Used to love ‘em. I remember the ROAR that would shake Pittsburgh’s Civic Arena when a Bruno Sammartino feud was heated enough (and booked well enough) to take the second rematch INSIDE A 10-FOOT-HIGH STEEL CAGE! (Or was it 15?) It was a rarity.
Nowadays, gimmick matches OVERRUN wrestling. Dot just about every card. Illogically so, too.
Cage matches, for example, used to be mandated when the heel too often ran away, or too often benefited from outside assistance. Now, it’s random. Wrestler A vs. Wrestler B INSIDE A 15-FOOT-HIGH STEEL CAGE! (Or is it 20?) No prescient reason applies but the marks roar anyway, because they’re supposed to.
Do you have any idea how much cash WWE rakes in because fans do things BY ROTE? Most WWE PPV customers don’t purchase because they’re legitimately interested in what a particular show has to offer. They buy because IT’S WHAT THEY DO, force of habit, a monthly social event.
Good thing, too. No one could produce 12 big cards per year worth watching. The ideal formula was quarterly. Gave storylines time to develop. But WWE learned to train fans like seals.
I laugh when message-board posters and their ilk say the business is about something besides money. There used to be an unspoken aesthetic, a legitimate desire to make the product good, if only because that was how to cash in. Now quick matters infinitely more than good.
BURN, BABY, BURN
I love slow-burn angles. They’re rare now, but WWE has a great one going with the unknown RAW GM.
I suspect it’s inadvertent. I don’t believe WWE meant for it to go on so long. But if, when the GM’s identity is revealed, it’s the RIGHT GUY, the roof will blow off. If the guy can have a match, it could be money.
The best choice would be Stone Cold Steve Austin. But he won’t wrestle. The worst would be a safety valve like Vince. Triple H offers possibilities. If only Shawn Michaels would work again.
I don’t know where this goes. I bet WWE doesn’t, either.
The sound effect, the lights flickering, the podium, Michael Cole’s deadpan heel work…it’s one of the best things on RAW, and in wrestling.
Mark Madden hosts a radio show 3-6 p.m. weekdays on WXDX-FM, Pittsburgh. Check out the Mark Madden page at WXDX.com. Contact Mark via wzmarkmadden@hotmail.com.
